Emotions are energy in motion
Each emotion we feel is a valid part of our human experience. Joy, sadness, anger, excitement, frustration – each one is a note in the symphony of life. Yet we avoid, distract & get pissed of when we feel the 'bad' ones. Sound about right? The problem is in the avoidance, we suppress. In the avoidance, we stuff down somewhere deep inside. The emotion (aka energy in motion) will morph it's way up & out through other ways, when you least expect it. This is where the practise of meditation allows us to get intimate with our broad spectrum of emotions & less afraid of the intense ones. First of all, we're tuning into our bodies, feeling sensations, and allowing. Acknowledging its presence, allowing space for it to be felt, perhaps understanding its root, however this is NOT crucial, what is a game changer is the noticing. Observing the twisting, pulling & pushing, and intricate influence to our thoughts. The mind body connection is WILD.
“Meditation offers us a canvas, where each emotion becomes a stroke of paint. Instead of looking at individual strokes with scrutiny and bias, meditation allows us to take a step back and appreciate the entire masterpiece.”
Over time, we learn not to identify with every passing feeling or thought. Instead, we witness them, understanding that they are transient, just like clouds in the sky. ☁️
😡 Anger as a tool, not a master.
We're conditioned from a young age to chase the ‘good’ emotions, and avoid the ‘bad’ ones. For me Anger is an emotion my mind lobbs over in the ‘bad’ pile. Towards the end & shortly after feeling anger within, it's often closely followed by a wave of shame / guilt. I feel guilty about feeling angry, and even angry that I'm angry. I'm not entirely sure why. I could surmise that I grew up in the 80s, where girls are nice, respectful, easy going, go with the flow, and don't cause any trouble. Well at least this is what my brain interpreted as a child (way before my prefrontal cortex was formed) & then this was reinforced as I was rewarded in school & early in my career for “going with the flow” and not causing trouble. I still default to this today from time to time. The difference is that I'm aware of it (most of the time).
Often, unconsciously I resist anger. And it's not until I stop & be still with the sensations in my body that I notice. And the aftermath is shame. It creeps over my back and into my heart space. Julia Cameron has a beautiful and different perspective of Anger in her book & program “The Artist's Way”. It's a course in uncovering your inner artist, have you heard of it, or done the course in the book? It's a ride! 🎢 Her expression of anger had such a different perspective than my inherited beliefs. Some exerts below that stayed with me.
Anger is FUEL. We feel it and we want to do something. Hit someone, break something, throw a fit, smash a fist into the wall, tell those bastards. But we are nice people, and what we do with our anger is tuff it, deny it, bury it, block it, hide it, lie about it, medicate it, muffle it, ignore it. We do everything but listen to it.
Anger is meant to listened to. Anger is a voice, a shout, a plea, a demand. Anger is meant to be respected. Why? Because it's a map. Anger shows us what our boundaries are. Anger shows us where we want to go. it lets us see where we've been and lets us know when we haven't liked it. Anger points the way, not just the finger.
… Anger is a tool, not a master. Anger is meant to be tapped into and drawn upon. Used properly, anger is use-full.
….Anger is not the enemy. Anger is our friend. Not a nice friend. Not a gentle friend. But a very, very loyal friend. It will always tell us when we have been betrayed. It will always tell us when we have betrayed ourselves. It will always tell us that it is time to act in our own best interests.
Anger is not the action itself. It is action's invitation.
It is action's invitation. Ooph. We first become aware. We stay with the sensations in our body. We soften. We relax. And then from that place, our soft knowing voice, the one that has been buried deep & hidden, has a chance to be heard. From there, from the spaciousness we act. Which in some situations mean we might not do anything at all. Sometimes the change is inaction. We don't send that email. We don't have the same argument. We don't say those hurtful things. And the act of not doing anything is remarkable change in itself.
…we feel the energy, we listen & move forward, with courage to have the uncomfortable conversations, and to make the changes our soul's seek.
Next time you have an intense emotion, see if you catch where it shows up in your body. Can you stay with it. Get curious instead of judgmental. After all it's just energy in motion.
Tip: Language is powerful. Changing from “I'm angry all the time” to “I have Anger within” helps extrapolates our emotions from our true selves. I use this when I'm feeling sadness within as well. The separation free's you from the heaviness.